Allie Beth Stuckey is an author who caught my attention in 2020. She had a couple of tweets that really made me mad. Here are the tweets and my response. She never answered me.
As you can see, she is a delight. (Please hear my sarcasm). She also likes the word toxic, and I will get to that in another post. I have been astounded by people like Stuckey’s resistance to alleviating student loan debt but having no damn problem with banks being bailed out. In 2008, George W. Bush bailed the banks out due to their regulations being too LOW, and that was the biggest transfer of wealth from the poor to the rich in our nation’s history. Did you know that? Here is one resource for you to read and think about this from a different angle: Bailouts. I find it odd what they think the federal government should involve itself in and what it should not—it is always for their cause when it intervenes. Save the banks, the people can go broke. Got it. They never answer to the fallout of their worldview when questioned. Their belief system is set, and any interference with it is an attack. When we (people who are not far-right extremists or conservatives) ask those questions, some of them believe we are carrying out what is called “toxic empathy.” We are trying to make them feel like terrible people so they will disobey God and do what we, the progressives, want in order to appear “good.” This is what Allie Beth Stuckey argues in her book Toxic Empathy.
I am going to write a separate post about the desire to be good and its pitfalls. That is a cultural problem all around, but I want to focus on empathy right now. What it is and what it isn’t. Stuckey has created a definition of empathy that is not backed by science. I am furious b/c too many people on the Right are creating definitions that are not accurate to the terms they are using—grooming, pornography, CRT, indoctrination, etc. This is a pattern we need to break with them. They need to learn what terms mean and to stop confusing people by making words that have had a definition mean something else. They believe in flat interpretations of words—until they don’t. What I am gathering is Stuckey is confusing empathy with a highly sensitive person, and she is attacking their gifts because these gifts do speak to the human condition that must be faced, not just economics, rights, freedom, etc. If they feel like terrible people, that is for them to explore. I am not saying progressives and Leftists are not doing a little of what she is saying so try and get them to change—facts sure are not changing them—but that is not what empathy or a highly sensitive person does. If anyone is attacking them personally, it is the same spirit Stuckey is writing her book under—the accusing spirit, also known as Satan.
Last night, I went to Mardel to see if any changes were being made to their stores now that we know the election of Donald Trump has been a disaster. I knew the answer would be no and that I would find more disturbing evidence of ways they are still advancing the cause of Christian nationalism that is wreaking havoc on our society and around the world. Public school teachers’ jobs have become so difficult/(toxic) b/c of Christian nationalism. Mardel and Hobby Lobby owe our culture an apology and need to do a lot of repair work with their merchandise. Not saying they need to eliminate the voices they want to uplift, but they need to include the other sides. Accusations without a rebuttal are how we are allowing due process to leave our society. That should have you alarmed. No one is safe if we eliminate due process for any reason. You are only as safe as the person who has created the worst offense is treated. If Law and Order was easy, innocent people would never be accused. Compassion, even for the worst offender among us, is good news for you. That is not a feeling; that is a fact. Do you want to be the one accused without due process? Stuckey’s theology is built on a relationship between law and order with God—not a friendship with God—and they are making our government function the same way. If you break the belief system, you are sent to hell—on earth as it is in heaven.
THIS IS WHY WE HAVE SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE.
People in our community and government participating in Christian nationalism are intentionally targeting people—in college, public schools, federal workers, etc—to carry out their idea of what a biblical worldview is. Stuckey travels the nation speaking to organizations about the importance of having a biblical worldview—she is not a theologian but a communications major. That is spiritual malpractice. A few days ago, I wrote about a local university in my area that carries out that worldview—it is weird, low-quality, not serious, and a major breach of both scripture and education. With a biblical worldview, they fit every concept to their fixed ideology. The Psychology professor made the gospel of Matthew fit his lesson on Psychology. Any challenge to their worldview, some claim, is from progressives who are weaponizing compassion. Empathy is a word that has recently entered our vocabulary as a culture and is not very well understood, even though there is a lot of scientific studies on it. Empathy is being called toxic and a sin by some influential people on the Right. Most recently, Elon Musk called Empathy the weakness of the West. At Mardel last night, I found Stuckey’s book on toxic empathy. After seeing her previous book, You Are Not Enough (and that is okay): Escaping the toxic culture of self-love last year, I decided I was going to engage her work. Too many people are spreading false narratives about empathy, and it is causing needless and cruel suffering for the most marginalized among us.
I am tired of accusations by those on the Right being met with no rebuttal or response. Now society is getting more upset at the silence of their friends and family on these issues than the outrageous accusations. We want our people to fight back. Very serious things are happening, and now we have to speak up. This is now hurting the country and the world. This is not just a difference of opinion; this is the difference between democracy and autocracy. They have taken over our government and are trying to dismantle all of our structures to form them in the image of their “biblical worldview.”
Stuckey’s book on toxic empathy talks about the conflation of empathy with love, and I have a lot of objections to her arguments that I will expand on in the upcoming posts. Writing a book about other people and not including a response from anyone from the side they are writing about is in line with the work of Satan. Satan, as described in scripture. Satan, in Hebrew, means “adversary” or “accuser”—it means to obstruct or oppose. This is exactly what Stuckey and those on the Right are doing. Our society is set up so we get to talk to our accuser. You don’t get to judge without a response.
Stuckey also does not understand the actual definition of empathy.
I will be writing my rebuttals to her arguments in the coming days, weeks, and months. This is the conversation of our time. Let me end this post with how the Bible defines love and a juxtaposition of Stuckey’s definition of empathy in her book against how the book sensitive: The Hidden Power of the HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON in a LOUD, FAST, TOO-MUCH WORLD.
1 Corinthians 13:4-12 NRSV: Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.
Stuckey’s definition of empathy:
But empathy literally means to be in the feelings of another person. Empathy by itself is neither loving nor kind; it’s just an emotion. Love, on the other hand, is a conscious choice to seek good for another person.
Toxic empathy says we must not only share their feelings but affirm their feelings and choices as valid, justified, and good.
Here is a response from Jenn Granneman, author of the book Sensitive:
Don’t let anyone tell you that sensitivity is a weakness. It takes immense strength and courage to navigate this often callous world with deep emotions and an empathetic heart.
Don’t be fooled by the stereotype. Sensitivity isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength. Being deeply in tune with your emotions and your environment can help you navigate life with empathy and power.
I will continue this argument in another post. This is a good start. I hope this will help us have better conversations. More engagement, less accusations.
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